Sometimes it takes watching the lives of others unfold to finally realize the patterns in your own, and what things mean. We receive intuitive guidance almost non-stop. It is learning to pay attention to it and recognize it for what it is that is key. For the last few years I have been doing dream interpretation and other readings for my friend Chris. It is really easy to see where others need help in their lives, but not always in our own. So what inspired me to write this blog was one of our recent conversations. He has been having some really clear dream messages coming through. For the last few years he has felt the urging to be more.. do more... with his life. The general underlying theme is dissatisfaction, and not knowing which steps to take to get out of his own way. He sent me this dream today, and I love to give him hell and ask him if he honestly needs me to interpret it, because it's just that obvious. But like I said, when we are in it, we can't recognize the forest for the trees.
Copyright HBoucher2011
So his dream was this: "I was at work, it was dark out - and it was storming out - with tornado warnings - everyone wanted to leave but for whatever reason I said let's stay put. At that point the tornado ripped part of the roof off. It was scary but I knew we'd be ok. Afterwards I began working on an invention that keeps roofs on buildings in the event of tornado."
So maybe if you don't know him, you may not get the clarity in it. But this dream was telling him that he has been having urges to leave his job, and current city for some time now, but out of fear has been choosing to ignore them. We get these urges and insights for a reason, and what I've come to realize is that they are there to guide us away from painful experiences, or to get us to where we will be happier, if we will just listen. This dream was telling Chris that even if he chooses to ignore the tornado warnings, and stay put, ignoring his intuition to move on, the universe will step in and sometimes it's not so pleasant. But that he can turn chaos into creation and use it to better himself. His dream is saying that no choice is wrong. He will get there no matter what, and will be ok.
I started to think about this and some things that usually go along with not listening to those first urges. We often end up getting angry when the universe steps in, blaming whatever people are involved in the situation making it their fault, when in reality we were being warned! For instance, I have been involved in a mediumship group for about a year now. It has had its ups and downs, it's explosions and rebuilds. I started to feel uncomfortable in the newest group formation and dreaded going. I wasn't sure why that was because this is one of my passions. I started to see some things that were going on that just rubbed me the wrong way. It has a tendency to be very clicky. Everytime I tried to sit down and figure out what it was that was bothering me I would distract myself and go anyway. I ended up having a doctor appointment and called to cancel group that night because I didn't want to arrive late. And I immediately felt relief. I didn't pause long enough to reflect on the relief I felt however. So a few days go by and I start getting this over whelming feeling that I was not going to have friends much longer. I sat in my bathtub deciding to really get a focus on it. Where is this feeling coming from? Am I making a certain friend mad? I went on a walk with my friend Jeff, and as I was telling him this my phone buzzes that I have an email. When I look, it was the man that runs the group saying that my slot had been filled because I never gave my availability for the month. Immediately I knew what that feeling was and where it had been coming from. Little did I know it wasn't to stop there.... I mentioned this to another friend whose paranormal group I was with who happens to be friends with the other. I had a sudden flash that I would no longer be part of this group either. One week later I was telling my friend that I felt this was going to happen, and when I got home, I had an email from her saying I was not a fit for her group. When we got into the topic of her paying back money she owes she accused me of being a liar and that the other man had witnessed this as well. At first I was extremely hurt... then I got mad.
Instead of blasting people which I tend to do when I get angry, I just sat on it. Something kept telling me that I had been warned. After the last couple of dream interpretations of Chris's I started really thinking about this as it reflects back in my own life. I had several warnings to leave both situations, and chose to ignore it, thinking all was ok. It was all in my head. I had had warnings not to loan out the money. Not just in my head, but others. I didn't want to lose out on the friendships that I had developed within the mediumship group... and it seems as though that is exactly what has happened. Due to experiences in my past I go out of my way to be honest, and sometimes it is painful for all involved. Not just the one receiving the honesty, but for myself at knowing that I am hurting someone with that honesty. I have found that as much as people claim they don't want to be lied to, it seems they in fact do. I really had to rely on the people that know me well to help me realize that the accusations were just things that may be going on in their lives. It's still hard, because I miss some of those people... but you can't inject yourself where you aren't wanted, and sometimes you may not be wanted because they don't want their own foundations rocked. I had to really look at this situation, and remind myself that I had wanted to leave because I didn't like the ego, or the clickyness involved. I watched a cycle of people being in one minute and out the next, and it always made me aware that I could be in the "to go" seat at any moment. So when it happened to me, it really wasn't a surprise. I helped create the situation to be what it was because I chose not to heed my own inner voice that was warning me. Hard to be mad at anyone else when you serve yourself up a big piece of humble pie like that. We often don't take a bite out of that pie however and we just keep blaming everyone else for where we end up. We have to take responsibility for where we've been, where we are and where we are going at all times!!
When I think back over my life and how many times I have heard that inner voice, or felt those urgings to do something different, and didn't... I am dumbfounded. That inner sense is always there. And it is there for a reason. Just as Chris's is telling him to let go, that everything will work out and he can go home.... mine is saying it's ok to let go of things that no longer suit me and it will be filled by things that are. We do it in relationships.... holding on to ones that don't bring us as much happiness as we think we should have. We cling to them until they border on destroying us, rather than just releasing them and allowing their time to come to an end. We can't really sit on our pity pots wondering how we got ourselves stuck in some really yucky situations when we've had that voice inside us all along pointing out another route. Some people call that voice God... others their higher self, or intuition.... I will call it our inner guidance system. Our internal gps meant to keep us safe and happy. It's not at all like the man made gps system we all use to get us around our city... the one that makes us go down streets that don't exist or have us end up on the wrong side of town. Ours knows our true path... it warns us the best way it can.... and if we do end up on the wrong side of town you can bet your hiney that there is something there to be found!
The more you allow that voice to guide you, the stronger it becomes and you won't be sitting there dumbstruck.... more like awestruck! How many times have you done something to later kick yourself in the ass and say "MAN if I had ONLY LISTENED!!!" This like everything else takes practice... and the more you practice the easier it becomes. You can't change what you can't see... but you can start to notice little bit by little bit. With light there can be be no darkness... You may not catch that warning everytime... but you can start by noticing it some of the time. Who knows where you'll end up and how much heartache you can avoid if you heed its warning! But even in those painful moments there is much beauty to be learned.... we always always always come out the other side.
Copyright HBoucher2011